tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post2937349035123148164..comments2023-07-15T03:45:36.822-07:00Comments on Surrender: Social issues: Feminism vs. Homelessness, an anecdoteConinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-12529215930781876922012-05-03T12:39:50.345-07:002012-05-03T12:39:50.345-07:00He was very creepy. Thanks for the sympathy.He was very creepy. Thanks for the sympathy.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-76838121847259864552012-04-30T13:23:36.326-07:002012-04-30T13:23:36.326-07:00I'm sorry to hear that happened to you, Conina...I'm sorry to hear that happened to you, Conina. It annoyed me most that he tried to be friendly with you and then you did something nice for him -- taking a picture while he posed, and then after he was done playing nicey, he started asking for things, and when that didn't work, he called you names. He basically took advantage, and in a very creepy way. If he'd just asked nicely, then it wouldn't have been a problem, but that's not the case. I don't blame you for being upset, I would have been shaken as well. Any negative words, even from a stranger, can still hurt.Rileyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01839475326755424479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-16701187334717603852012-04-29T11:03:09.174-07:002012-04-29T11:03:09.174-07:00I love this comment. :) Don't apologize.
I ag...I love this comment. :) Don't apologize.<br /><br />I agree about the money begged hardly ever being used for food, which is why I don't like to give money even when I do have it. If I have extra food on me, I'm happy to share what I have. People around where I went to college would hang out at the gas stations and give people pumping gas these sob stories about needing some specific amount of money to "Get home," ($2.45 or some random number), so I know what you mean.<br /><br />I think his attitude that if I did have any money I owed it to him is the main thing that grated on me, yes. That and his immediate targeting of me once my husband left my side, and his similar M.O. with other unaccompanied women later on.<br /><br />The guilt stems perhaps from him having stormed off and from me not having helped him out - but that's not on me. It's not my job to help him. And so the guilt and the anger kind of feed each other. The guilt makes me angry and the anger makes me feel guilty, and so on.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-90668525006888825252012-04-29T10:53:22.089-07:002012-04-29T10:53:22.089-07:00Yeah, I find I feel that way in many many places. ...Yeah, I find I feel that way in many many places. Just keep walking like you have a destination even if you don't, don't look around like anything is interesting, don't look like a target. GRRRR.<br /><br />That pisses me off the most because everything interests me - especially architecture, so even when I live somewhere I find myself pointing my camera at random buildings, the windows of 100+ year old buildings especially fascinate me.<br /><br />I had no idea the security of travelling with a companion was so limited though. The fact that we were together always seemed to shield us from most intrusions - it never occurred to me that it was because I was a woman out with a man, I thought we were mutual protection for each other. Now that that has occurred to me, I'm ticked.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-76358358524291093872012-04-29T10:49:06.109-07:002012-04-29T10:49:06.109-07:00Yeah, he looked really clean at first which is why...Yeah, he looked really clean at first which is why I was initially stunned when he started talking to me like any other tourist.<br /><br />The social issue of me becoming a target by being alone, literally for 20 seconds, really got my goat. <br /><br />By contrast, I spent two days alone in Seattle last year and not one single person bothered me. I suppose that was just my good fortune, or perhaps because it was November and less tourists were around to prey on in the first place.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-71522498906403243732012-04-29T10:45:55.686-07:002012-04-29T10:45:55.686-07:00I know, I was stunned. I was thrown at first becau...I know, I was stunned. I was thrown at first because he just looked like a tourist, until he got close and I got a better look at his face. <br /><br />I thought I was exceptionally nice to interact with him at all, as most people around there just ignore everybody altogether, homeless or no.<br /><br />It did seem like he felt entitled once he'd taken the time to be "nice" to me, but that's fucked up logic right there. I think he was also in a rush because he realized my husband would be returning to my side in a moment and he would be SOL then.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-53295152995441033192012-04-29T10:42:43.326-07:002012-04-29T10:42:43.326-07:00Yeah, I've had much much better interactions w...Yeah, I've had much much better interactions with homeless folks. They're generally much more sanguine in my experience.<br /><br />The guilt is part of what's pissing me off, too. I appreciate the validation.Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-8989918015777705822012-04-29T10:40:35.941-07:002012-04-29T10:40:35.941-07:00It is a beautiful city and we're fortunate to ...It is a beautiful city and we're fortunate to be close enough to it to not <i>really</i> be tourists. I mean, we can go back and not be spoiled sometime. Thanks for the sympathy. :)Coninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12267844904414770524noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-9874985237353110522012-04-29T10:08:18.228-07:002012-04-29T10:08:18.228-07:00I very rarely give money. I have given dog food, b...I very rarely give money. I have given dog food, bread, water, sweaters, etc. And I find that if people really need it, they are just as, or more happy, to get those things than money. And I think it's rare that money begged gets used for food.<br />My father was homeless for a time and never asked for money. My mother in law is off and on homeless and wouldn't be caught dead begging for anything.<br />My sil is a junky. She will ask anyone for money, and I won't give her a penny--because I know it's all going in her veins.<br /><br />More than anything perhaps its the approach that implies they are entitled to what you have that grates the wrong way? And being an asshole when you don't get what you want doesn't win any points either lol.<br /><br />I think that maybe the guilt stems from wanting to do good and feeling bad about it not working out that way?<br />It is painful to see people who are genuinely in need of life's basic necessities.<br />Of course, some of them aren't really--there's a man in our town who is always hitting everyone on the street up for money. His family has more money than god and he has access to it. So it's his personal choice.<br /><br />Omgoodness. I may have made no sense at all. This is one of those overboard comments that could have been its own post. But now I feel invested and like I have to click "publish" lol. Sorry.Stormhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12613795542678253943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-49304900756914243922012-04-29T08:54:55.351-07:002012-04-29T08:54:55.351-07:00San Francisco is where I learned never to stop my ...San Francisco is where I learned never to stop my forward propulsion on the street even to answer a question. Once you stop there, you are exposed. It is sad and it makes me grouchy too.Kitty the Submissive Wifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00185859722963938064noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-75086899340257018772012-04-29T07:05:58.008-07:002012-04-29T07:05:58.008-07:00Hvae you considered that he may not have been home...Hvae you considered that he may not have been homeless? He may have just been an ass that targets and preys on women. It's unfortunate, but there are plenty of people who are taking advantage of the poor economy and the generosity of others for there own gain.<br /><br />And what does it say about our society that a woman alone, even for a brief moment becomes a potential target?faerie wingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09749617812384896845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-27358990517867752442012-04-29T06:37:43.708-07:002012-04-29T06:37:43.708-07:00You should be mad. He invaded your space and even ...You should be mad. He invaded your space and even your phone! If anything you were too nice putting up with that phone stuff. A nice normal homeless person will just simply ask if you have change for a hot dog. End of. And if you say no, they just move on to the next person. The name-calling is likely the result of first developing some kind of short-term "relationship" with you through the phone nonsense. And once you had become like acquaintances, and you wouldn't give him money, he got obnoxious.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-34192697560319056812012-04-29T04:56:06.777-07:002012-04-29T04:56:06.777-07:00You have every right to be pissed, Conina--no need...You have every right to be pissed, Conina--no need to feel guilty. The guy was rude, demanding, insulting, intimidating and basically a jerk. Why feel guilty about that? I get that he's homeless, but polite is a requirement for everyone...Jakehttp://leathercuffsandsilkenbonds.com/tag/bondage-info-for-women/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1261315018538317662.post-63084922187934654642012-04-29T04:40:12.563-07:002012-04-29T04:40:12.563-07:00Hi,
San Francisco is a beautiful city, I am sorry...Hi,<br /><br />San Francisco is a beautiful city, I am sorry that he spoiled part of the trip for you. <br /><br />Hug,<br />joeyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com