Monday, January 21, 2013

A funny thing happened while cleaning the bedroom


I have a funny story, which I was reminded of while over reading The Taming of L.

I make floggers, and I don't really make a big secret about it within our home. To my little one they're just beautiful works of art, so he doesn't pay them any mind. The exception to that is when I've just finished a new one - he'll tell me "So pretty!"

My husband keeps our selection of floggers stashed between our mattress and the wall (platform bed). It makes quite a nice pile, and with his long arms he can reach any of them.

Several nights ago, he used all of the floggers on me - plus our riding crop. It was pretty nice, as there are several floggers he hardly ever uses. I could definitely tell the difference - I was looking behind me trying to figure out what he was hitting me with.

Anyway. The next day, I was cleaning in our bedroom when the little one came up to me. "What's this?" he asked, and I didn't see him right away. "Mommy?" he asked, to get my attention. "What's this?" He was holding the crop, which had been resting on top of the pile of floggers - behind our mattress.

Oddly enough it wasn't that awkward. "Hey, you know we've told you not to go back there," I said to him.

"Sorry!" he said, handing me the crop and going about his business like nothing ever happened.

Fun times in sexyland.

Do any of you have funny I've-been-caught-out stories?

27 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I was texting my husband about it immediately, all giggles and OMG. :)

      Delete
  2. My wife was on Skype with a friend. While they were chatting, her friend's cat jumped on her desk with a small flogger in her teeth.

    They both laughed about it while my wife teased her.

    Hug,
    joey

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh cats! They will find the things you think you've hidden, for sure. Thanks for sharing. :)

      Delete
  3. Phew. That sounded so easy :)
    My daughter once came downstairs with a handbag size vibrator she had found in the upstairs bathroom cabinet. It all would have been fine if she hasn't held it up for all to see, namely her dads friend who was sitting at the kitchen table trying not to choke on his coffee, and said "mummy, what's this?"

    Dee x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was delighted he didn't go on and on about it - "but what IS it, Mommy?" he could have said. Nope. :)


      Whooooa that's a heck of a story - in front of friends and all. Clearly you've survived it though. ;)

      Delete
  4. Oh, holy funny!!!!! I don't think (knock on wood) that any others have found our toys....however we've had our share of young ones appearing when we're playing....knocking or opening a mistakenly unlocked door...that's seriously traumatizing!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've heard of stories where kids find their parents stuff, and then... just don't ever say anything to the parents. So who knows? :)

      My (least) favorite is when the little one comes zombie-ing in in the middle of sex, mostly asleep, and plops himself into our bed, puts his head right on his daddy's side. Yeah. That's a bummer. HE doesn't notice, but the sex generally ends. Generally.

      Delete
  5. Oh my! We haven't had to experience that! Thank God! My face would've turn three shades of red. Glad you were able to just gloss past it

    P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I mostly just got insane giggles after. He's only just turned 5, so he's curious about EVERYTHING... "What's this, Mommy?" is a question I hear seventy-eighty times a day. :)

      Delete
  6. Yeah, we have been walked in on, listened too, found anal plug with a flash light on it, and the littlest one was so proud to have found a flashlight under the bed. Oops!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have an anal plug with a flashlight on it? I now have a crazy amount of curiosity about this object. WHY?

      Delete
  7. Glad I could inspire you! Funny story...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love finding inspiration in blogland. :)

      Delete
  8. Now that's funny! So far we've managed to keep everything on the down low, but the great discovery is in the works. I just know it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's harder as they get older, and our "toys" also multiply.....

      Delete
  9. Our daughter found our ties once. We left them on the bed, but underneath (obviously not far enough under). Next thing I know, she's asking, "What's this?" with a cuff around her small wrist. I can't remember what I said, but it didn't overly concern, she bought whatever I said and never mentioned it again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have a recollection of something like that - we have a sportsheets restraint set back in our old life, still tied to our headboard, but with the cuffs tucked between the headboard and mattress - it rings a bell that when he was smaller, he pulled one out and was playing with it...


      Ooooops. :)

      Delete
  10. i love all these stories. We have yet to have anything found although i am certain the question will come soon "What is in the big, back, locked chest in your cupboard"!

    ava x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am loving all the stories too!

      The big thing is having an answer prepared when they ask that.

      "The bodies of all the other kids who've asked that question." (complete with menacing look) :)

      Delete
  11. I think it is only in retrospect that the kids will be like, "Holy Shit! That was a (fill in blank here)..."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hopefully by the time he knows enough to know what they are, he'll be cool with it (after perhaps a bit of the standard 'my parents have sex?' angst. :)

      Delete
  12. Replies
    1. I know. Pretty much anything he does is cute, unfortunately..... even the stuff he shouldn't be doing. :) Thank you!

      Delete
  13. Making paddles to sell on Etsy has been interesting, especially since most of the kids want to help dad with his woodworking. We have pretty much convinced them that they are bread boards or cutting boards. The older two are probably not buying it but they haven't said anything yet. I do get funny looks at the post office though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've seen people use pizza peels as paddles, so why the heck not the other way around? :) I pack all my stuff up at home and bring it into the post office already wrapped. (keep Priority Mail boxes around for when I need those)

      I love the idea of the kids wanting to help with the woodworking on paddles.... hah. :)

      Delete
  14. ah yes, there was that incident a few years ago when our eldest, a young teen at the time, came stumbling into our room at night complaining we'd woken him up and 'why are you CLAPPING?!'

    Um yes, you can imagine what we'd been doing... Hands had been meeting flesh indeed...

    Husband said that I'd told him a really funny joke so he'd been clapping me!

    One or other of the kids have found the velcro restraints on the bed when I've been changing it at least once, and asked what they were for... I've told them, completely deadpan, that they're there 'in case I need to tie daddy up' they weren't quite sure of my sense of humour I think!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for reading. I hope you'll let me know you were here - I like friends!