Monday, July 2, 2012

Answering questions no one has asked me, volume 1

No hot sex tonight, but some of my recent searches have caught my eye and/or downright concerned me. So here I shall highlight some recent search terms and answer them to the best of my ability.

conmdition your sub to love sucking cock: Before you can expect anyone to want to suck your cock, you should probably gain that person's respect first. The phrasing of this search and the glaring typo in it just set my teeth on edge. Okay, I love blow jobs, but not everyone does or can. Especially if it's approached from this mind-control sort of angle. A great band once sang - "Love and understanding are the best answers I've heard yet."

You might want to start there. 

got out the vacuum cleaner and sucked my husband's dick: I could really go so many ways with this. Unless you and your husband get off on trying to actually vacuum the floor while you are sucking his cock, this is a bad, bad idea. I once read of a man who sucked all the skin off his penis with a vacuum (and apparently other stuff happens, too). So. No, okay?

On the other hand, vacuuming the floor while you have your cock sucked could be a handy skillset. No need to let the household chores go undone, am I right?

how to tell my husband i'm submissive: This isn't funny at all. There are so many ways it can go. But if you have a good, solid foundation in your relationship, find a way to tell him. This awesome story has something like how I often talk to my husband about difficult things, with my face buried against his chest and those long, long pauses while I gather my words.

The desire to submit is a deep one, and it's hard to feel fulfilled if it isn't met, or if you don't at least try. But approach cautiously - you've had time to think about it. He hasn't.

17 comments:

  1. Excellent post. It is a real challenge for a husband or a wife to discuss submission.

    Hug,
    joey

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    1. It really is. And even though we've had the talk, every time I think of something else I would enjoy, it returns to that same difficult place for me.

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  2. Do you think the vacuum cleaner is more of a passive agressive search - like, I hate him type thing?

    I like this post a lot! I think it is good to speak to some of these search terms because, well, you come from a place of authority. :)

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    1. That honestly hadn't occurred to me, but it might well be. "You want your cock sucked? Well here!" Ack.

      Thank you! :)

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  3. Any husband or wife that has successfully accomplished this deserves a woohoo!! Woohoo, Conina!

    Seriously. It's especially hard to do when you are married and already know each other so well. Much more embarrassing to tell that person your hidden desires, and to get them to do things differently than is their nature. And even if they do things differently, it would take a miracle for it not to feel phony. But the embarassment factor is huge. I mean seriously, this is your husband, theoretically he isn't going anywhere, so once you've let the cat out of the bag, this would be an elephant in the room forever if things don't go well.

    Ok, now that I've given everyone reading confidence to share their hidden desires with their spouse . . .

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    1. You know what's weird? I thought he knew already. We'd talked, and done things, a lot. But he thought it was more of a thing that I really liked that I didn't require to feel fulfilled - more the ice cream or even the expensive Thai meal than everyday fare.

      Even just telling him that I needed more was hard. Thanks for the woohoo. :) You're absolutely right. It's hard to say it so it doesn't sound like "I need this and you're not giving it to me."

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    2. You don't need ice cream to feel fulfilled? We really are very different. Hee!:)

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  4. I need to keep this one for when I decide what all I want exactly from my "H". Telling him is the hardest part.

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    1. You're right. I've found though, that the more talking you do about everything, the easier it becomes to introduce more things. I wrote a post last year that included many of the ways we came to where we are. Pressed into pressing: My husband as Dom.

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  5. Nice post, I almost addressed some of the search terms that I get recently. I got a particularly disturbing one that really bothered me and did consider addressing it, but then it just didn't happen. I will say, I never really thought of it as giving advice to someone, as you have done. Interesting approach that I hadn't considered. Hmm...now ya got me thinkin', lol.

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    1. I figure if they're looking for it once, they might do it again (or someone else will), and then my post will be there!

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  6. Neat post! I like how you answered questions that were indirectly asked to you. I bet you helped out those searchers! Now you're inspiring me to do something similar. We shall see. :)

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    1. I hope so. I can't wait to see what you do!

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  7. "The desire to submit is a deep one, and it's hard to feel fulfilled if it isn't met"

    That is an awesome line, Conina, as as close to the heart of it as I have ever seen written. It takes the right one to call to that deep place. And it takes having that submission accepted to feel complete and fulfilled.

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    1. Accepted is awesome. Treasured is even better. :)

      Thank you for the praise.

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