Thursday, April 12, 2012

Flogging girl and other search term funnies

I am the flogging girl. Apparently my average google position for the search term "a flogger" is 6.5. 6.5! I'm just some random blogger, and I'm a vegan! There is no leather in my bedroom, so for the term "a flogger" to rank me so highly in google just blows my mind. For real.

That said, I do have quite the array of floggers, and I keep buying rope to make more. And they feel so wonderful, so why not? The more I make, the prettier they get. Although a recent one didn't turn out as pretty as I'd hoped, it still works quite well.

Checking my keyword searches for the last week started out typical, but at the second page I paused, and from that pause after there was a gigglefest at my kitchen table. I had to share with my readers, because who doesn't enjoy a good laugh?

endless orgasm - Yeah, we're all after that.
fucking doggy style - Yes please?
he slapped my breast - Quite often, yes.
he stroked my leg - This is a thing? The things you learn.
how to excite husband to dominate me in bed - Ask him! No, for real.
husband him-more-submissive - Not sure where you're going with this, but either way, go on with your bad self!
i like penis in my mouth sex and cats - And cats, huh? Well, me too, but what an odd search. This is where I started giggling.
mistakenly slipped into ass - Not mistakenly. Around here, it's all quite intentional.
my husband fuck my throat - "My husband, fuck my throat?" Yeah, that's what this meant.
my macbook pulled one of my pubes - The crowning glory, the reason I doubled over giggling at the table. This person actually spent about 9 minutes here, so, hi! Sorry about the hair though, that had to hurt.


  1. Thats is hysterical I have never checked that before. I will have to take a look for sure.

    1. I've only recently begun getting any that are remotely interesting, like this. Probably in the past month or so, for whatever reason. Mostly it's just boring stuff, but occasionally there's a gem like the macbook one. :)

  2. OMG!!!! Too funny, but, a cat? That one is a little creepy, lol.

    1. I thought so too at first, until I began reading it as "I like penis in my mouth, sex, and cats." Which removes the cat from the sexual acts, but is still very very odd and definitely giggle-worthy.

  3. Very funny. I really like a good flogging as well, but I have never made one out of rope.


    1. It's fun! Except for the blisters. The blisters aren't fun. Wear a heavy-duty glove on your dominant hand. There's a tutorial up in my tabs if you're interested. :)

  4. Too funny! I think the macbook comment takes the cake. And I didn't realize you were vegan, that's really neat. I'm vegetarian. :)

    1. The macbook search is comedic GOLD. So glad that I mentioned my husband's macbook in a post once, just to get this hit for a laugh.

      I was vegetarian for 6 years or so, have been vegan for a little over 3 (I think). It's always nice to realize there are people even more like you than you thought. :)


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