Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Bad writing hurts me the most

I have read some really awesome experiences. Some of them are so well written that I can cringe with the pain, rejoice at the pleasure... ride the coaster along with the writer. Especially if it's something that has really happened, that comes through in the writing and the experience is all the richer for it.

Sometimes, though, it's fiction. I like fiction too, I like to read about fantasies as well as reality.

Sometimes the stuff is so poorly written that the grimaces and grunts that come from me aren't in response to the pain that may be going on within the written piece, but physical responses to the poor quality of the writing itself. I can't handle it, and yet I have a thing in my head that leaves me unable to walk away from something once I've started it. It's horrible. My own special brand of masochism, I suppose. Except I don't like it at all.

Then when I see responses to these things that cause such alternate amusement and pain in me, they're overwhelmingly positive. I get that writers need encouragement, but they need feedback too. I can't give critical feedback amongst a swarm of "This is awesome!"

If it's something that happened, then there's all kinds of leeway for it. A historian can't be expected to create things that didn't happen or that can't quite be recalled properly due to the hormones flooding his/her brain. Good writing is still appreciated even here, even if the narrative itself is full of gaps. If it's fiction? Then I'm going to expect a bit more. If it involves human characters, I'm going to expect they'll behave in a human fashion, and that their body parts will act as normal human body parts do.

Erect human penises of an average or above size can not "slide easily into" human throats that are at an angle. It's not possible. So if there's a woman lying on her back and a man fucking her face while sitting on her chest, that's fine. But it ain't going all the way down, unless it's a tiny thing in which case it's not going into the throat at all. If she lifts her head and shoulders up and he lifts himself up, then that makes a better angle for throat penetration, but it requires her to have some motivation. She wants it. It requires him not to just thrust frantically from his happy seated position on her chest, but to put some work into it by keeping himself up higher.

That's just one thing that drives me crazy. If my brain is screaming to me "THIS CAN'T HAPPEN!" then I have a hard time enjoying the story. Now, if you want to make the guy an alien with a bendy cock that can go right 'round that bend? Awesome! Now we're talking, but don't make it ridiculous unless that's what you're shooting for. I can go with some hilarious porn on purpose. Or if we want to keep them human, he can get off her chest and stand behind her and the act of her tilting her head back for him will straighten her throat out. We all know this, right?

I think it's quite damaging to anyone identifying as kinky, too, that so much low-quality writing is floating around. Shiterotica, which elevates the whole sad situation to a level of hilarity worthy of MST3K, should not have such a wealth of material.

So I'm a newbie and I want to read about all these things, fantasies, reality, everything, I suck it all down. I internalize that image of a man sitting on a woman's chest and somehow, magically getting his cock down her throat. What's going to happen when I can't do it? When as a receiver I can't take a cock down my throat in that position, or when as a giver I can't get my cock down a throat in that position?

Fantasy death.

Horrible thing.

"These people wrote about it, surely they know what they're talking about. Something must be wrong with me!"

End kink exploration because it causes bad feelings.

Worst case scenario, of course, but it could happen. Don't we have some responsibility to describe things accurately? Is it not just as hot that a person has to lift up his/her head and shoulders to straighten out the throat and swallow a cock?


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I thought I was the only one that was picky. Poor writing is such a turn-off.

  3. lol.
    I do think you raise a very important point though. As a rather avid blog browser, the lack of reality bothers me sometimes, especially in a D/s context.

    Because there's a human tendency to compare and drool over the greener grass. It can raise unrealistic expectations. And it doesn't really serve anyone well.

  4. maui girl: Hooray with the linking! And you said it was over your head. We'll have to agree to disagree on that particular piece of writing, though. :)

    Anonymous: It certainly is.

    lil: It doesn't. Frustration because you can't do something that can't be done has to be the worst kind. The example I gave is a fairly common one, but so many others (especially kinky ones) that are unrealistic and people who don't know that have no way of measuring it. Those unrealistic fantasies then spawn more unrealistic fantasies from their readers until that seems to be reality. But it can't be!

    So all I can really do is rant here futilely and try to write things that are real. Or clearly label an unrealistic fantasy as such. That'd be a good start.

  5. Lol! I'm picturing it doing a U-turn to get down her throat. Hee! I always make sure the angle makes sense when writing stuff like that. But then there are some writers, I have in mind an actual best-selling author, who sometimes spends so much time describing the complex positioning of all the parties involved that I feel like I have to draw a map in order to understand what's going on.

    The key is to describe it in a way that makes physical sense AND is simple to follow, without having to stop reading and think about the positioning.

  6. As you know, I'm with you on this one. I've read my way through a lot of bad writing, mostly fanfiction to be honest. I will even admit to having written bad fiction as well at some point. I was young though. I know better now. Which begs the question...

    Shouldn't people know better? After reading their own stuff, don't they realize that it's all a load of crap? Are they not able to distinguish between good and bad writing? But, I guess as long as there are people who read, they won't stop.

    I've come to the conclusion that it's less frustrating when I keep my hands off anything that already starts bothering me in the first couple of paragraphs. There have been few exceptions to the rule that something that starts out bad has to stay bad. I can count those exceptions on one hand though.

    In the end, I don't care if it's fiction or real life experiences. When it's well written, fiction can teach you a lot.

    There is one important rule though: Write what you know.

  7. BlackberryTasteIc: Another fantastic comment! But you forgot the even more important rule: Proofread, for Pete's sake! :)

    People can't tell whether their writing is bad. Often they can't tell when it is good either. I spent years proofing academic papers - papers to be GRADED - and the things they would bring to me hours before their due dates were just pathetic, for the most part.

    Once I edited someone's doctoral dissertation. That was the worst job I've ever taken. Somehow they just don't learn to write, even through years and years of writing practice.

  8. t1klish: I have no idea what author you could be talking about - I've only been reading Terry Pratchett for the last several months. :) But absolutely, when a reader has to stop and think too hard about what you're describing, you've already ruined it.


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